It's one of those rare times when you're watching a video and it's so embarrassing that you actually switch to porn to avoid explaining what you're watching if someone walks in.
There are more diets out there than stars in the sky, and every single one of them is tied to the financial portfolio of the author. No matter how fancy the package or pie-in-the-sky (mmmmm, pie) the promises, there are certain principles you can count on. Start here, figure it out from there, then name it after whatever kingdom, genus, or species you think will be marketable.
On the topic of diet, supplements are probably more confusing to most people than actual eating is. Shouldn't be, because most of them are utter crap and not worth your time or money. Still, there are some that you could benefit greatly from, so don't write them all off.
Because it wouldn't be any fun if we left you with advice that made sense, here's some more things to consider that will probably contradict all the nutrition tips in the second link. Bam.
And you know what? I'm totally not sorry for putting you through that.
It is always amazing to see how creative people are on the internet, but seriously...if you walked into the house of someone doing all of these things, brainy though they may be, you would totally assume they were a serial killer or head case (particularly the onions hanging in pantyhose).
Or you can throw spoiled groceries out at the end of every week and fight about the money you're wasting. Whichever.
Maybe considering your personality type would help you understand why you like to let broccoli die in your refrigerator...? Probably not, but do it anyway.
Speaking of which, if you are a humorless a$$hole, there's a good chance that good customer service is something you've heard about or seen played out in front of you, but never actually experienced. Work on that a little, would ya?
To get you in the right frame of mind for that, watch all these people get hurt on a toy that should have been banned in pre-production as being an obvious death trap, because nothing is funnier than other people's pain. Nothing. Comedy 101 right there.
A lot of people get into fitness to emulate the superheroes they grew up reading about in comics. These Hollywood interpretations explain why mediocrity is such a pervasive force in society because wow - could these be more awful?
However, there are some pretty cool human beings who actually existed and managed some amazing accomplishments in the realm of physical culture. (Bonus points for those of you who actually pick up on where we took inspiration for our brand.)
And before you accuse us of outright stealing the term "physical culture," just remember how difficult it is to be creative in the first place. At least we added the "untapped" part to it, so bug off.
Seriously, creativity really is difficult to muster and easy to derail.
Morality is a moving target but there are ways to think yourself to being a better person. Number one: don't steal other people's terms for exercise. OKAY, FINE WE ARE SORRY. Moving on...
Pull ups are difficult and push ups are underrated. Some of the hardest men in the history of fight sports made both staples of their fitness regimens. Oh, sorry...didn't mean to interrupt your set of cable crossovers with A DOSE OF REALITY.
Are we still debating the role of safety equipment in sports? If you're sparring without headgear, you really need to pull your head out of your ass. A study determined that a helmet would need 15" of foam in order to adequately protect your brain from trauma caused in some sports; basically, you would need to wear one of those inner tubes people use for tobogganing around your brain pan. If you're a coach, you definitely need to know this stuff; if you're a competitor and you don't want to become a drooling pumpkin, you need to know this stuff; YOU ALL NEED TO KNOW THIS STUFF.
The above paragraph could have probably benefited from some polishing to make it more compelling, but whatever. We all know what the seven most persuasive words in the human language are, anyway.
That's it and that's all. Jusqu'à ce que nous nous revoyions, mes amis and mes amies!
Dropping Knowledge Bombs
We do our best to gather up a generous heaping of articles, links, and entertaining photos for you to share so there are no awkward silences around the water cooler at work that week.